I don't have internet right now. I didn't pay the bill and I didn't see the point if I'm not going to have a place to live. I am connecting using someone else's wireless connection right now. I apologize if you have emailed me, I will respond after I post this.

Thank you again to those who have helped thus far. Those little bits have helped and I was able to put a little money towards the rent which extended my notice till tomorrow. I have no idea what I'm going to do tomorrow, because I do not have the money to pay the remaining amount. My health insurance payment is due at the end of the month too, and at this point I'm weighing what is more important and to me health insurance is more important so I guess I'll have to make my final decision tomorrow as to what I'm going to do. I'm applying for disability, something my doctor told me to do over a year ago and I should've listened, which should give me access to food stamps and goverment healthcare, but in the mean time I need to make sure I have health insurance as my prescriptions total over $1k a month so I would not be able to afford them without it.

I appreciate the kind words most of you have sent but I feel like I need to respond to something that really hurt me. I'm generally a tough person but maybe it's because I'm so low at this point that this really affected me.

I received an email from someone disputing my situation. They attacked me claiming I'm just looking to take people's money and used evidence of my last auction, the Xbox auction. I wanted to say that first, I did not get enough from that auction to be able to afford the Xbox in the first place. Shortly there after all of this financial stuff started to unload and I used that money to pay some outstanding medical bills.

It may not make sense to those of you who have never experienced devestating medical issues, but I am not in a position to even take a job working part-time, even at McDonalds. If this is incomprehensible, I ask you at the very least to be thankful that you can't understand this. I would never wish this on anyone. Be thankful that you are able to do the simple things, like shower, without difficulty. The problem lies not with having a serious medical condition, but in that it has yet to be diagnosed and properly treated and at this point my doctors are trying anything and everything to figure out what is wrong. I have extensive medical debt because I have undergone nearly every test my twelve doctors have come up with and tried numerous medications and therapies.

I have struggled financially for awhile but it has never been this dire and has gone in waves. I panicked awhile back because I thought this day was coming but I ended up getting by and so I went back to putting up the "everything is great" facade I do so well. Not too long ago I was able to do occasional work here and there but I have gotten worse and that is no longer possible. I had the hopes that a large sum of money was coming through with regards to a lawsuit, and so I was not concerned, but I lost and here I am.

I don't know how often I will be able to get online and check my email. I don't know how much longer I can keep this site up. I'm not sure where I'm going to be living soon, but I just wanted to thank those who care. You don't have to send anything. You don't even have to read this, but what good does it do to just try to hurt someone you don't even know with a nasty email? I didn't get here by buying extravagant things. Do I wish I could have those things? Of course. But I wish I could be healthy more than anything because that's my golden ticket and no amount of money can buy that at this point.

And no, I'm not lying...